chrishansenhome: (Cartoon)
[personal profile] chrishansenhome
The old town has been at the egg nog again, it seems.

Friday, Dec. 18

  • At 8:27 a.m., there was a motor vehicle accident at Atlantic Avenue and Community Road.

  • At 11:59 a.m., a caller on Washington Street said she wanted to speak to an officer regarding a neighbor who was leaving the back door open and letting the cold air in. This is the slippery slope at the end of which the police officers become social workers. SHUT THAT DOOR!

  • At 2:25 p.m., there was a report of a hit and run accident with a van hitting a car on Front Street.

  • At 10:11 p.m., there was a report of five people wrestling in front of a restaurant on Pleasant Street. Nothing was found. Just look for a group of guys in tight singlets.

Saturday, Dec. 19

  • At 10:41 a.m., there was a report of a breaking and entering to a motor vehicle on West Street.

  • At 11:10 a.m., there was a call from the Palmer Police Department regarding someone in a motor vehicle registered in Marblehead taking photos. Officers spoke to the woman, who said that while she was picking up her daughter, she took a photo of a deflated inflatable Santa Claus as part of a project called “Santa Down.” She said she would call the Palmer Police and explain the situation. Are there that many deflated Santa Claus figures around? And is taking a picture of one something the constabulary ought to be investigating? Enquiring minds want to know.

Sunday, Dec. 20

  • At 1:03 p.m., 2,000 pesos were found in a park on Lighthouse Lane. That should give someone a Feliz Navidad.

  • At 3:02 p.m., there was a report of a lost cellphone. The girl said it it did not really matter if it was found, since it’s Christmas and she’ll just get a new one. Oops! Coal in the stocking for this one!

Date: 2015-12-23 02:38 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Perhaps photographing deflated Santa is a variety of lèse–majesté. She ought not to have done it. You can't be too careful while the war on Christmas is still going on. There are spies everywhere!

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